helen weld public health

Gratitude & Renewed Perspectives. . .

Last weekend and early into the week I was all-overish (adj. Feeling an undefined sense of unwell that extends to the whole body) and missed a few meals which meant by the time I returned to the communal table I was definitely avidulous (adj. somewhat greedy). Agerasia (n. a lack of the signs of old age) is a quality that I generally pride myself for, but being horizontal for more time than usual had its agathokakological (adj. composed of good and evil) effects…having some quality time with my Kindle (good) and also feeling older than I really am (”evil”).

I have been immersed in a wide variety of reading (Teddy Kennedy’s memoirs True Compass, Baking Cakes in Kigali, Richard Russo’s That Old Cape Magic and now Reading the OED). I have often thought that if I was imprisoned or stuck someplace for a year and given the choice of one book, I would choose the Oxford English Dictionary. Ammon Shea has taken it upon himself to do just this. I find the book pretty fascinating and as you can see I am trying to include some “As” to expand my vocabulary and exercise the gray matter.

While I was experiencing the “cellular ache” of whatever it was I had, dreaming of luxuriating in a hot bath, I quickly roused myself out of such self-indulgent fantasies and imagined the challenges facing all of the patients who come here to VHW seeking treatment. I was pulled back into my fortunate reality of a cosy bed and a roof over my head as the rain pelted down “hippos and elephants”. I thought of the many people who walk for hours through the pouring rain feeling terrible (and hungry!) often carrying their ill children, doing their best to survive on practically nothing. Everyone has their own sort of pain and suffering, but wow, I felt so spoiled. I came away from my reveries with a renewed sense of perspective and compassion for these significantly impoverished people who I have the privilege to assist on a daily basis.

We delivered one patient home via vehicle last week as she was too weak to make the journey on foot. Her health has deteriorated due to chronic diseases and her possessions were in a small wrapped piece of fabric. Her house was a basic mud house with corrugated tin roof right on the busy tarmac thoroughfare. One could easily think she wouldn’t have any reason in the world to smile, but her delight with her homecoming certainly blew that idea out of the water. She was radiant, despite her emaciation, and just so happy to be HOME with her family! Witnessing the essence of her life, love and family, and receiving her gratitude was very moving.

Despite not speaking Kirundi, I understand more these days, but still feel severely handicapped by not being able to converse directly with all these lovely people.

Walking to “downtown” Kigutu at dusk, I feel quite integrated into this small community on the top of a hill. Listening to the drumming, watching the local soccer game and hanging out a bit at the local boutique greeting VHW staff as they head home. It’s a special place indeed. How lucky I am for these friendships I have made here.

Now I can begin to feel the tide turning as I prepare for reentry into my “other world”. I am really looking forward to the reconnections with family and friends, but also ready to pack a lot into the last three weeks here.

Helen